Top 5 Baseball Players To Eat Various Foods Off Of

Let’s be real people, baseball players are the “bangin’est” athletes out there. And there’s nothing better than them except food (and beer). So why not combine the two into on epic hot mess? Cuz that’s stuff I actually think about man. These are your top 5 foods to eat off various players.

#5 Geovany Soto & Pizza

Gotta represent my favorite team, even though he went to the Angels.

#4 Kris Bryant & Buttered Lobster

As much as I hate the Cubs, gotta give this man some credit.

#3 Dallas Keuchel & Cinnabon Delights

Because the sweet cream would get stuck on his beard.

#2 Mike Trout & Fiery Doritos Tacos

Sorry Mike, Subway isn’t cool. Deal with the Taco Bell.

Angels at Orioles September 16, 2011

#1 Bryce Harper & Baconators

The real reason I even made this list. It’s been a long running joke that i’d eat a baconator off him. I mean, I would. But…yeah.

Get Drunk AND Save The Earth

Beer…we all love it. Now the environment and all its critters will too

A Florida brewing company is developing a biodegradable and edible replacement for the plastic ring wrap that is often thrown away carelessly in the wild and lands in the ocean, suffocating turtles and others or tangling them up. (Yes, a Florida company did this. The state best known for Walmart white trash.) Coincidentally the company doing this is named Saltwater Brewery. The new wrap is supposedly made of wheat and barley leftover from the beer making process, effectively cutting out a lot of waste.

You’d have to expect hipster animal lovers would be all for this, sipping their craft brew and smoking a fat j on the San Fran beaches. I just don’t see why other major companies aren’t doing this. In due time my friends. Save the earth one step at a time.

-The Irishman