The New Red Wings Arena Name Is Ruining My Mental Well-Being

So pissed. So angry. So distraught.

Ladies and gentleman, the new Red Wings Arena name is……

Little Caesars Arena

No. No. No. No. No. What the Howe.

From Olympia Stadium, to Joe Louis Arena, to a sanctuary named after a bleeping pizza company. Yes, I know the Ilitch family owns it. Yes, I know it was started in Detroit. But the 11 time Stanley Cup Champion should not be compared to a  $5 Hot-n-ready.

Look at this new palace opening in 2017:

Red Wings

That does not scream “Pizza! Pizza!” to me. Nope.

To make matters worse, the working title for the new home was “The Baddest Bowl in Hockey.” Among the rumored names was Caesars Coliseum, Hockeytown Arena, and Gordie Howe Stadium. Any of the three would have been insanely accepted by Red Wings fans. The same cannot be said for what was ultimately chosen (paid for).

Little Caesars

😦

-B the Eagle

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